The Need to Be Right

One thing that I have always struggled with is the need to right. Perhaps this comes from being the youngest and so often having to prove myself or perhaps this just comes from being human. If I'm right, I want everyone to know it, by gravy! It's not just enough for me to quietly to know that I'm right, everyone else needs to recognize that I'm right too.

It was a story by James Herriot that made me realize how much of a problem this is for me. Dr Herriot was a country vet in Yorkshire, England back in the post-war era (that is, WW2). I've always loved his stories, such as Moses, the Kitten. In this latest story, he tells of Mr Pickersgill, a distinguished country farmer who loved to throw big words because he was edjumacated during his "college days," a two-week basic agricultural class at Leeds University. He called on Dr Herriot because his cows kept suffering from "them masticks." (Mastitis) The vet realizes that the cows are suffering because Mr Pickersgill is so forceful when he pulls on the teats to milk them. However, he can't tell the dignified man that without insulting his intellect. Then he realizes that Mr Pickersgill is suffering from lumbago, a painful back condition that is caused by bending over to milk the cows. In a moment of brilliance, Dr Herriot suggests that perhaps his should stop milking the cows to stop the pain and leave it to his daughter, NOT to cure the cows' mastitis. Mr Pickersgill happily agrees, but suggests he try a cream his beloved professor back from his "college days" recommended to help his cows. Dr Herriot knows it won't work, but rather than insult this man, he is willing to let him believe that the harmless cream is what solved the mastitis and not the traumatic milking of Mr Pickersgill.

This would be like swallowing straight apple cider vinegar for me. I would have a hard time letting someone else believe they were right, and yet it is my own pride that wants to be recognized. In Dr Herriot's story, the man's dignity is saved and his cows are cured of their recurrent mastitis. I admire that and need to work on that more in my own life...especially when I am dealing with more experienced nurses/midwives and also dealing with cultural differences between me and my patients.

PS - if you ever get a chance to read some of Dr Herriot's writings, do! They are loads of fun...great mind resting books. :)