Beauty of Your Peace

I think I've blogged about this before on another site, but it bears repeating in different circumstances.

One of my friends recently lost her husband of 6 months. They had dated for several years and pledged to honor God in their dating life, engaged life, and married life. They got engaged late last year and planned to get married when my friend finished nursing school in 2010. Then he was told he had six months to live after a return of a brain tumor in January. They planned a beautiful wedding in two days and started life as one for all the time God would give them. They had too many special times to count, making sure to make each moment a "forever" memory. They built a love that would last 6 months or a lifetime, whichever God chose to give them. And through it all, they honored God.

Slowly God began to take her husband home. The tumor spread down his spinal cord. He had surgeries. He became paralyzed from the waist down. Even still, each moment was a gift. He never lost his memory and continued to let his wife know he loved her beyond measure. Last Thursday, surrounded by family, he went home to be with his loving Savior who loves him more than any earthly being could.

My friend has been incredible through it all. There have been times of wailing grief, silent tears, unshed sorrow...and yet she has always felt the presence of her heavenly Father by her side. She will continue to grieve, knowing she will never feel his hand squeeze hers, hear his voice praise her, see his eyes adore her, and feel his lips caress her, but she knows where he is and where she is going someday.

What does this have to do with me. First of all, it doesn't have to be about me...the life I live is not about me, but about Christ. Nevertheless, it does cause me to stop and think. I seem to be on the brink of a new journey...a journey I never planned. It's easy to sugar-coat the journey, thinking of the exciting times. And yet there will be times of intense sadness, grief, and hurt. There always is no matter what the journey.

I've recently been working through my worn hymnal, painstakingly playing the hymns with my poor piano skills and singing along. Sometimes my foot is stomping, sometimes my eyes are weeping, and most times I'm just quiet and let the words fill my spirit. One hymn that I keep coming back to is "Be Still My Soul." The words are so fitting for my friend's circumstances and for my own:

Be still, my soul! the Lord is on thy side;
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain;
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul! thy best, thy heavenly Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.

Be still, my soul! thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul! the waves and winds still know
His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.

Be still, my soul! the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord,
When disappointment, grief, and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, loves purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul! when change and tears are past,
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.
-Katharina von Schlegel

God will always be faithful to guide my future (and my friend's) as He has our past. It won't always be bright and cheery, but it will always be by His side and at His leading. and it will ALWAYS be worth it.

prayer cards

They are on their way! I finally started on making my little prayer cards for this upcoming trip. Whew!

And glory, hallelujah, the application for the mission agency is in! Please pray that I am accepted by the mission and that the process will go quickly,

Soli deo gloria!

In other news, I am continually amazed at how incredible the body of Christ is. You are never a stranger if you find someone else who is a believer. I've only lived in this area for 8 years, and yet nearly every shift at work, I can make a connection with at least one of my patients: mutual friend, school, church, mission, etc...


Thanks for your prayers! I leave in just 9 days! (And work for 6 of those)

overwhelmed

In preparation for my trip to the Philippines in two weeks, I started collecting baby clothes at church. I made little flyers, had an announcement placed in the church bulletin, made a cute little sign, and camped out at the information booth for last three Sundays. I wasn't sure what type of a response I'd get...after all, our church just finished a huge drive for baby clothes for the new pediatric hospital we built in Malawi.

God had a surprise for me. I now have 8 supersize garbage bags FULL of baby clothes in my garage. This is a case of the nets being too full! God is so good. I'm excited to begin sorting through the clothes and putting little sets together to hand out to new moms who need the clothes. I was also given 50 baby quilts from a ladies group at church, quilts that are all hand-made with love.

There are times in life when we get so caught up in the routine of life that we forget how blessed we are to be able to serve such an amazing God with our whole lives. To live for a purpose greater than two feet in front of me is a perspective I often forget to hold. Then there are times when we take a step back and are absolutely awed that God has included us in His giant plan. Me. little measly me. These are the moments I cling to...the big picture. It's not about me. It never was.

Take my life and I will be ever, only, all for thee.

Where He Leads Me, I Will Follow

Welcome to my Blog!

Now that I've prayerfully decided to go the Philippines as a full-time missionary, I thought it appropriate to create a website so those who pray for me can follow in the adventures God gives me. Some adventures will be exciting, some painful, some happy, some sad. But I know one thing for sure: life with God is never dull or boring. He promises an adventure if we take up our cross and follow Him!

So join me on my journey!

Sweet joy,

Pami