Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Learning to Listen

It was bound to happen with all the busy-ness and running around I've been doing. I finally got sick. My body is no longer immune to these tropical bugs and so I caught the cold going around. Now a cold all by itself is not so bad, though a friend commented that it is a bit weird in such hot, sticky weather instead of the frigid winter colds we're used to in the US. But a cold combined with flying is a horrid combination. I managed to handle it ok on the flight down to Boracay, but on the flight back to Manila, my ear never equalized on the descent. All that to say, my right ear is still plugged after a week. I feel like my head is under water. I hate it. A doctor took a peek at it and it looks ok, just angry, red, and really retracted...but no infection. A little research and I learned it may take up to 3 months to resolve.
On my drive to the birthing clinic this morning, I got so discouraged by this feeling of a plugged up head, that I just wanted to turn around, go back to my bed, and lie there until I can hear again. I'm tired of saying, "what? I can't hear you." I feel like I'm operating at half mast and that's not a fun way to start out a ministry.
However, and I think you know where this is going, it's really made me come to grips with the fact that I will never operate at 100%. Even when my body is fine, there will still be things I miss. I feel like God is using this time of frustrating deafness to make me focus more on listening to Him and hearing His voice instead of the constant cacophony of traffic, people, chickens, construction, and all manner of distraction.
Every time I talk, it sounds twice as loud. I don't like that. Maybe I'll learn to talk less and listen more intently.
I hope so.

2 comments:

  1. Amen! What a great reminder! Thank you, I needed to hear that today. Hugs from a few thousand miles away! ~SW

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  2. I hope you feel better soon!

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